Saturday, July 22, 2006

"A Happy Family Is But An Earlier Heaven"

The title is a quote by George Bernard Shaw. He has some choice quotes and some very cynical quotes as well. Of late, this is a quote that spoke to me.

A Happy Family...it is all that I wanted as I grew up and it is something that I still long to have. Family and home, those are the havens, the safe places, where all of the world should cease to bear down upon you and where you ultimately are lifted and loved.

Is your family your heaven?
Is this the spirit of your home?

These are questions I like to have in the back of my mind - the answers to these questions lead me on as my choices come up. When considering a choice or route of action, I wonder: Which end am I moving towards: heaven or hell?

It is no wonder that this is the topic of today. I've had a lot of time to mull over the questions I typed above many times this week. I feel that if a happy family is an early heaven, then surely an unhappy family is an abysmal hell.

I've seen my share of both - I've had blissful moments where tears flowed like life giving water and togetherness was all that mattered - I've also had hearkbreaking times where words flowed like darkest poison and nothing else mattered. I want so much to build a heaven and leave the hell behind.

How can it be done? Over time with trial and error, I have found that in all things we must do our best to use wisdom, understand that we have to believe in and hope for the best from those that we love, love eachother, and when push comes to shove and it is time to come together, be the one to lay down your fiery darts & your weapons of war, and take responsibilty for your part, and ultimately return and make amends with an increased measure of love.

I have to admit, this "time tested" method can really work, or at least when I have been able to approach things this way, even if all things are not 100% better, I have cleared a space to stand in and work towards further restoration and building trust up again with whomever the offense or misunderstanding involved. In other words, I get another chance at my earlier heaven and all is not lost.

Tonight I want to remember our families, our friends, our neighbors, basically anyone with whom we have even momentary contact. Pause for a moment and ask: where am I going with this relationship, to heaven or hell?

If you are in hell, please get out! I beg you to allow the healing to begin. If the situation allows, let the prisoners of your grudges and old hurt be set free. I understand that there are "big hurts" that may not heal for years; if you have any one of these circumstances, I offer you my sincerest hope that one day you may find peace and be healed. But the situations that I am talking about are the little splinters that fester. They live just under our skin and still have the chance to be pulled out, undergo a cleansing, and we can have that part of us bound up to mend.

If you can, have courage, bring heaven into your life now and bind up the wounds of those who are in need; mostly yourself and of your own heart.

I believe that a happy family truly is an earlier heaven. May our families be happy, hopeful, and protected by our every thought, word, and deed.

Friday, July 21, 2006

Blog Name Dissection

I wish I had a more clever way of figuring out a cutesy blog name, but nothing about me is cutesy, hence even something as simple as a blog name had to have some sort of meaning.

So, what is "Ku'ulei Ali'i"?

Let's break it down - Hawaiian to English:

Ku'u: If used in the possessive, it means "My Sweet".

Lei: As a noun, this means a garland, usually flowers, leaves, or shells, given as a symbol of affection; if used figuratively, it means "beloved child, wife, sweetheart" so called because a beloved child was one that was carried on the shoulders of the bearer, draped like a lei.

Ali'i: Chiefess, ruler, noble, king, queen, commander, royal, regal, to rule or act as a chief, govern, reign, to become a chief or chiefess.

So all together, there are many meanings, and I take all of them into my heart. My father named me "Kuulei" - my sweetheart - and truly I was his sweetheart, his firstborn daughter, and he was my sweetheart, "Kuuipo", that is in his middle name.

And the "Ali'i", well it is the goal to which I aspire, if you understand religion you'll understand what I am talking about - "to become royal" - it is the path I am on, that we are all on, we just sometimes forget about it amongst the tedium of days gone by - but truly, one day, adorned with wisdom, I hope to rise up and be this Ku'ulei Ali'i.

Pretty deep huh...yeah, I know.